What a long day. What a long month. How about you?
Christmas was truly amazing over here. We really had so much fun doing some of our regular traditions like Polar Express in PJs with hot chocolates, sugar cookie baking, and our family trip to the Nutcracker. (Don’t think we are crazy taking a 7 and 5 year old to the Nutcracker. A local ballet program puts on a condensed version called The Nutcracker in a Nutshell, which is just the perfect length for kids. We all attend that one for now and will upgrade to the full length performance when we the little gal can handle it.) We ended up skipping some traditions, without notice by the kids mind you, because there was just so much going on.
Post Christmas, the kids and I have basically hunkered down in our home to recuperate from the go go go. The major extrovert in me loves people and is super energized by being around others, but after a few days of nonstop hosting (including 3 Christmas get-togethers on Christmas Day), I needed some calm, quiet, and to get a little order back in our home.
Yesterday, I helped the kids get a few things in their rooms organized from the Christmas explosion. Today, I had to move along to the joyless task of year end financials for our business. uuuuggghhhhhh. It always stresses me out to get started. Because of my background in finance, I manage the majority of our personal and business finances. That often leaves me feeling that our financial standing falls on me, which sometimes creates a bit of stress. That is probably an understatement. The type A personality that dominates here just doesn’t want to show any weakness. (insert hiding face emoji)
A few weeks ago, I met with our CPA to make sure we had everything together and were on the right track. I always get that feeling like I’m walking into the principles office. I’m just waiting to get scolded and hear, “well, you really screwed it up this year, you guys are going to need to write a check for $35,000 to the IRS. blah, blah, blah.” Or, something similar. (insert terrified emoji + sweaty forehead emoji)
Thankfully, that hasn’t happened yet. (relieved and sighing emoji) (ok, enough of the pretend emojis) Wrapping it all up today took me a lot longer than expected. The kids had A LOT of electronic, tv, device time to make it happen. (feel free to share your judgement with a friend over wine) Funny thing is, though, after I get all the spreadsheets completed, numbers confirmed, phone calls back and forth with our investment adviser and the CPA, file the papers, decide on year end contributions and giving, and ya da ya da ya da, I feel amazing. So accomplished. Like a rockstar woman juggling all the things.
While on the “I’m killing it” high, I make a bad call and walk around my house and take in the mess. I should have just put on the blinders and bee lined for a “you are so awesome” bath. I tackled a lot today and feel great about it. But, this always means that something else was overlooked. There are still dog hair bunnies in the corner, 3 laundry piles upstairs, dirty dishes on the counter, and I will probably order pizza to be delivered after I post this since the fridge is bare except for never ending ham and turkey leftovers. Scratch that, hubs is ordering now. I have not exactly achieved a beautiful balance to being at home with the kids, house upkeep (along with the still getting settled part), meal planning, blog writing, finance management, on and on.
I know I am not the only one struggling for balance. Yet, I will continue to work at getting better. The struggle of knocking out 10 things today and leaving 12 things for tomorrow, hopefully, will turn into knocking out 15 today and only leaving 7 to carryover for tomorrow. Then, I will really be winning at life. (I hope you giggled there too.)
Being a woman in the days of social media and scrolling through others’ “perfect life” pictures, can be weary if you let it get to you. I cannot care for mine and try to keep up with theirs too. I’m just over here working at letting go where I can, not pretending to manage it all perfectly, and to share a little more of my weaknesses with you so we can all feel a bit more connected.
Just wanted to share that with you tonight. I hope some of you can relate to my day of dominating at one thing, yet still feeling lacking. I’m trying to get back in a groove here with the blog and continue to share a little more of who I am with y’all. Friendships are always more fun that way. Here’s to killing it again tomorrow… maybe with those pet hair dust bunnies. Wish me luck!
Also, where can a girl get some emojis on this blog platform!?!?
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