Hello again. Confession: I will likely veer away from the main context of this blog from time to time to share a little about our life. Today, I come to you with a serious vacation hangover.
Yes. Vacation hangover. Have you been there? How did you make it out? What is the expected recovery time? The week-long blissful vacation I just returned from, with my husband, has left me with a self diagnosed case of vacation hangover. I know it is not actually a thing, but it certainly sounds accurate.
The trip was so amazing. We left the kids with grandparents (bless them) and went away to California to celebrate our 10 year anniversary. We ate and sauntered our way through San Diego and its adorable neighboring beach communities. There were cocktails, late nights, afternoon naps, strolls down the beach, a swanky speakeasy, and so much food I will surely be calorie counting right up to Christmas. Just kidding, I don’t calorie count.
The lack of schedules was so peaceful. No kiddos to get ready for school. No after-school activities to rush around to. No bedtimes. I super missed my kids (sometimes). Absolutely. But, the ease of being on my own for a bit was so… well, easy.
I read an entire book and began a second. I worked on some blog drafts and researched quite a bit for what’s coming up here. I did Pilates. I lounged poolside. I enjoyed some serious quality time with my man. I listened to music I enjoy instead of the Descendants soundtrack for the 100th time (who knew I still had a preference).
All that glorious vacationing. Then, like a head on collision, we were thrown back into parenting. Maybe the transition would have been more smooth if our weekend could have been full of sweet snuggles, movies on the couch, and take out. But, hey, life ain’t easy is it? Friday evening, just off the plane and running little gal to a birthday party. Saturday morning soccer game, two more birthday parties, and scoop up pets and all of the kids’ things from grandma’s house. An actual mountain of post trip laundry. No food in the kitchen. And, two little humans coming off their own “spent a week with grandparents” hangover. Yikes! How was I not more prepared?
I thought I had planned well by leaving the weekend to prepare for the week ahead and regular routines. I was so ready to see them that I hadn’t noticed how unprepared I was. I was operating somewhere around 30% parental capacity, at best. I had not caught up with regular mom me who is usually 10 steps ahead. It showed. I was struggling. I struggled with patience and just couldn’t keep up with the madness.
Don’t get me wrong here. I definitely missed the kids with their infections giggles and joy. We picked up the obligatory souvenirs. I even mailed them notes and postcards and facetimed them daily. I missed sending them off to school with kisses and the usual “you are awesome! Have an amazing day.” But, I did not miss the grumpy kids who show up in their beds some mornings, or the ones who get angry at the breakfast table because their sibling looked in their direction. I also did not miss the frustrated mama I become when those trying moments happen. Vacation me is much more fun.
I am a couple of days in now and slowly getting back into mama groove. I’m catching up to the schedules, school prep, homework, refereeing arguments, adjusting attitudes (mainly kids, but often mine too), cleaning house, meal planning, cooking, all the mama things. It feels a little like coming out of anesthesia. Stirring awake and a bit unaware of my surroundings.
Motherhood isn’t easy. I love it. I’m good at it. Not great, and far from perfect, but good. Let’s hope I will be back to 100% in a few more days. I probably look like a first time mama walking out of the hospital with an infant snuggled tight, deer in a headlight look on my face, unsure of what to do next. Give me just a little more time everybody. I’m working on it. I wish vacation me, who is calm, could take over the crazy mama me, who yells when she gets frustrated. Wouldn’t it be amazing if that happened? Could chill Sterling please show up more often?
Until I come fully around, I will be just be here swooning over the trip, the food, the views, and all that amazing time with my favorite guy. Lots of prayers here for patience with my kids and their patience with me. Everyone is adjusting in our household.
Do you have suggestions? Prescriptions and dosages for this hangover? Please comment below and share them with me!
Once out of the fog, I will be diving into home loan applications this week and sharing that with you. I will write soon about some of the things we are doing to get this home ready to move on out!
Wish me luck!